Elena at Home
with daughter Christina
Elena caught the Baby!!!
Mr. Gorbachev and Elena
Elena with parents
A Russian-born visionary who after 29 years of intense soul-searching is now sharing her insights on the mechanisms and tools for creating our own reality.
Elena had her first formal training in Russia at the College of Arts in theater. Since 1982 working closely with the waterbirth pioneer Igor Charkovsky, she moved on to organizing birth camps at the Black Sea and delivering babies amidst wild dolphins. Together, they launched a program of natural delivery and birth trauma release for adults as well as for babies.
At the same time she was working wholeheartedly as a facilitator in business seminars called "Games", that were extremely effective in bringing economic changes to the USSR. Also, she was simultaneously involved in "Citizen Diplomacy" - an underground organization created with the purpose of putting an end to the Cold War.
Elena has a daughter, who is a constant source of her mom's inspiration. :)
Well, now allow me to introduce myself informally. I am a Russian woman with an Italian last name, living in California... My journey - the story of my own healing - has become the poster child for my work.
I graduated from the College of Arts in Russia in 1980 as an actor. After working in a theater for 9 months I had a powerful realization that all my training in performing arts was about my skills to act as somebody else. It left me with no identity of my own! When I was not playing something I was not, I did not know who I was! Throughout the years of my theater school I was taught that it takes a lot of talent to pretend to be somebody else. The realization that happened to me was that it takes a lot more of a talent to stop pretending. I left the stage and never looked back.
Ever since then I was engaged in many very different activities in economical, political, spiritual fields of Russian reality. They all had a common theme for me. Whatever area I was focused on, - it was the energy of a breakthrough that I was after. Surrealistic twilight absurdity of Mother Russia was calling for some changes!
Nine years later another powerful realization occurred! It suddenly became clear to me where I needed a breakthrough the most was in my own personal life! I was looking into my new baby's beautiful eyes, freshly out of my 6th marriage. Changing the world around me and trying to save the humankind did not pay in family-valued currency; it did not make up for me not being present in my body.
I stopped everything, moved to America in 1989 and started my life from scratch, again. I had to learn to speak a new language, to drive, to do the shopping "American style", to be a mother, but most of all to figure out, finally, who or what and why I am. When I remove the ways of identifying myself through my activities or belief systems, what's left..?
Gradually, I've obtained an infinite fascination with such a complex "event" as a human being. As that is exactly how I perceive any individual I've ever met on my path – as a multidimensional, ever-evolving event, - not as solid, "carved-in-stone" object. I see myself as a curious, shape-shifting, little explorer, moving through the vastness of our Universe... I found it a comfortable place to be and enjoy many kinds of activities, like dancing, hiking or simply doing Nothing.
Here is another way of introducing myself:
Counting My Blessings
by Elena Tonetti
Blessed be the time when I was scared,
and the time when I was brave,
when I was poor, young, silly and kind,
when I was jealous, generous, forgetful and old,
forgiving, gorgeous, ugly,
and everything I EVER was...
Blessed be the time when I became an enlightened Buddha
and knew compassion and spaciousness.
Blessed be the time when I became the Great Inquisitor
and knew the hell of separation.
Blessed be the time when I became Jesus Christ
and knew Love and surrender.
Blessed be the time when I became Adolf Hitler
and was completely numb and crippled in my heart.
Blessed be the time when I was Aphrodite
and knew my senses and my sex.
Blessed be the time when I was Mother Mary
and knew the magic of creation.
Blessed be the time when I was Josef Stalin
and knew the ultimate corruption of Power.
Blessed be the time when I was accused of witchcraft
and burnt at the stake.
Blessed be the time when I was a champion, adored by the crowd.
Blessed be the time when I was a gypsy and had no land of my own.
Blessed be the time when I was a soldier for hire and raped women.
Blessed be the time when I was Helen of Troy and caused wars.
Blessed be the time when I was Mahatma Gandhi and stopped wars.
Blessed be the time when I was discovering science.
Blessed be the time when I was burning books and homes.
Blessed be the time when I was a greedy lord of a big province.
Blessed be the time when I was a farm girl
and knew my herbs and my seasons.
Blessed be the time when all of them were me,
and helped me know right from wrong, feel human and alive.
Blessed be the time when the Divine Feminine became me
and I had to give away my power because I did not know how to use it in the world of men, and witnessed the damage I was causing.
Blessed be the time when I was overwhelmed by my responsibilities
and dropped out of the game.
Blessed be the time when I did not know better
and let the darkness prevail.
Blessed be the time when I remembered who I am,
whole and complete, and still in one piece.
And blessed IS the time when I feel ready to hold the torch HIGH
And see the way.
PS: well, if you are still here, here is another one:
Making Love With The Ocean
(it came to me in the rhythm of waves...)
I took a long walk this morning
Along the edge of the Waters of the big Ocean...
Along the edge of another world that was pulsating
And breathing at my feet...
That body of water was alive and conscious of me -
It was watching me with curiosity and kindness...
As I was slowly intoxicated with a musky scent,
Opening my pores and nostrils and soul and spirit...
And then, the Ocean reached out and kissed my feet,
Sending waves of intense sensations up my legs,
All the way... To the top of my head and tips of my fingers...
And then It reached out again
And caressed gently the skin of my inner thighs,
Inviting me in...
Inviting Itself in...
All of a sudden, an ancient memory stepped forward...
I was a tiny sperm about to penetrate a huge, glowing, pulsating Universe of an Egg -
She recognized my sacred longing for Her
And I was invited in -
She was waiting for me Her whole life
And now was grateful to see me finally;
Lifting all taboos,
With relief and urgent purpose.
The sensation was so magnificent,
As I slipped through Her impenetrable wall -
It melted me into non-existence...
I exploded in orgasmic ecstasy...
And that explosion divided Her in two!!
And thus my body had a Beginning...
The pulsation of Life Force that allowed me
Has the same Rhythm
As what Ocean Waves are dancing to, -
It is the call they answer and obey...
I was conceived in Love -
The Impulse of Bliss is my Motherland -
That is the only way a new life can begin, -
whither they knew that or not, -
Without this, the act of Creation
Is simply not possible!!!
Today, on the shoreline, I felt the same -
My tiny body was in the presence
Of undulating consciousness...
Caressing me, holding me, penetrating me,
Melting away the last degrees of separation
Until I remembered who I truly was and who I am now:
I am one of the many voices of the Divine Feminine!
I am Her ears and Her eyes;
And through me, She knows Her pleasure
and Her sadness...
Through me, She knows Herself!
The same way She knows Herself through you,
and you, and him, and him,
And through this dog and this tree...
And through Her, - I know!
With every fiber of my being,
I know how precious my life is,
How deeply loved I am and gently supported...
Overwhelming tenderness arose in my heart,
as I saw that the Ocean of Bliss
Makes no exception:
It penetrates all of the existence,
And is omnipresent, as they promised...
I smiled through tears of happiness
and allowed myself
To fully feel the wet procession on my face...
I made Love with the Ocean today...
Mine is one of the many voices of the Waters, -
This Ocean was our cradle once;
It gave us Life and It has the power to have it away,
if we will not awaken to our intimate belonging.
We, the people, were a 'runaway' project so far... -
In return we were disrespecting the Waters,
Dumping our waste into It and destroying Life.
It has given us a few warnings already;
yet we are not listening...
It really loves us...
Let's love it back!
This morning I was humble and barefoot,
Walking away, back into the city,
Gentle breeze ran it's fingers through my hair and
Blew soft whispers into my ears...
The sand was playing with my toes,
Slipping through, like Time,
Caressing the tender skin in that special place, in between my toes...
I am taking all of this with me,
to share with everyone I meet...
I am not willing to waste another day feeling alone!
I used to think that ours was the fate of clouds,
Dispersed above the deserts of the world...
And now I know, - it was a sword
Slicing my Bliss into doubts...
There is never a day when all of this is not mine!
And yours, and his... and hers... and ours…
I’m giving permission to know that and shine...
And cherish the years and hours.